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He didn't dare to buy them in public at the mall, afraid of being detected. He even had ordered them under a female name.Due to his bulk he couldn't find any dress in his size. His wish to wear dresses, even only in the closet couldn't come true. He often dreamt that he was wearing the most beautiful dresses, but in the end he awoke to find himself in the hard world of every day life. One day he couldn't take it anymore. He wanted to commit suicide but didn't know how to do it. He would think of a way the next morning.The next morning he woke up to do it. It had to be quick and definitive. He decided to jump of a bridge. To make his statement he would wear his female underwear. He got out of bed and took a shower. He walked back to his closet and grabbed a pair of panties, a garter belt and stockings. He slid them on and went back to the closet to grab a shirt and trousers.He took his shirt but as he opened the drawer for some trousers all he saw was skirts, skirts and skirts.. She had a number of operations and went through hell trying to conquer her illness. Our kids were all married but stopped by most every day to see their mother. She had her own bedroom now and I had mine.There wasn't any love making between us except for holding her and sometimes cuddling. My sex life was down to reading stories or masturbating to a porno flick. She knew it and didn't like it but I told her it was better than the options. I wasn't going to cheat on her.After her death, I still didn't date. Hell, I was sixty-five years old and wasn't about to start over. Who the hell would want an old man?I thought about my life and knew I had lived a good one. A loving wife and great kids. I thought back to my moment in time and did wonder what Jill thought that day in the bedroom so many years ago.As I mentioned earlier, I saw her maybe a dozen times throughout the years. She and Tom catered parties and other occasions. Whenever we went to one, I always said hi to Jill and gave her.
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